We know that work, family and keeping up with everything in life can create stress. However, many people miss that the inner stress of old negative experiences, unhealed emotional wounds and traumas can also cause stress, sometimes decades after the negative has happened, and even if we don’t think about them. Unhealed negative events remain in our body and nervous system.
I usually compare it to a beach ball under the water. It takes power to push a beach ball below the surface, but you can do it if you are strong and don’t have a lot of other things to handle. After a while, however, you start to get tired and if more beach balls appear that you must keep under the surface, it becomes even more difficult. Finally, the beach ball pops to the surface. It's the same with old negative experiences and emotional wounds. We can keep them under the surface if we are strong and don't experience a lot of stress in life. But after a while, you don't have the energy to keep the negative suppressed and at the same time deal with all life's demands and the negative bounces to the surface and brings a lot of symptoms.
Signs that there are still unhealed negative events and that your nervous system is out of balance: You have difficulty focusing, you have trouble sleeping or relaxing, you often feel irritable and restless, you react too quickly and too much to what is happening around you, you have low energy and are often tired or unmotivated, you forget more, you think everything goes too fast, you are always in a hurry, you experience worry and anxiety, you overthink, you have a hard time finding the joy in life. Please read here about how I work and about bottom-up processing.
Take control of the stress.
Many are amazed at how often they can feel a shift in their well-being, after just one session of hypnosis and hypnotherapy. One session can be equivalent to 10 sessions with a traditional therapist, sometimes more. We can reduce fear, worry and anxiety. We can reduce stress. We can boost self-confidence and self-esteem. If you want to make more substantial changes and create long-term results in your life, I recommend a mentorship.
With the help of hypnosis, hypnotherapy, EMDR, trauma-informed coaching, energy work and practical coaching, we work together to make you feel more balanced, happier and more capable of facing life. We can work online with the same good results as IRL with me in Malmö, Sweden.
Find out how the practical and a session works.
”Death by a thousand cuts”
It doesn't always have to be about major negative experiences that create stress in us as adults. If we were to look in the rearview mirror, we might say that our life has been ok. But we all carry small wounds with us, and I often talk about "death by a thousand cuts". Until 1905, it was a painful and slow execution that was used in China, when the crime was considered particularly serious.
Psychologically, the term is often used to describe how negative change that occurs slowly in many small steps, none of them fatal in itself, ultimately leads to a painful outcome.
I often meet clients who don’t understand why they have their problems. They have had a normal upbringing, as they call it, and have no trauma in their baggage. Many define trauma as major events involving alcoholic parents, domestic violence, deaths, etc. But then you haven’t understood what trauma really is.
The word trauma comes from the Greek meaning wound, and wounds can be both large and small. When I meet clients with worry, anxiety, anger, the blues, or low self-esteem and low self-confidence, I know that there is trauma behind it. Maybe not big ones, but many small ones. And just like with death of a thousand cuts, these traumas or small cuts eventually create suffering and pain and we don't feel mentally well. It is the accumulation of small wounds over a long period of time that ultimately creates the problems we experience.
Small wounds that arise within the family can be, for example, that you didn’t talk about feelings in the family, that you weren't comforted in the right way when you were upset, that mom and dad fought, a sibling who got more attention, mom and dad who didn’t listen to you or understood you, that your parents were stressed and worked a lot, a lot was expected from you.... the list goes on and on.
When you don’t heal these old wounds, your life energy stagnates and this can make you unmotivated, passive, anxious, depressed, unsatisfied, your creativity may decrease, and you have difficulty experiencing joy in life.
By taking care of these old negative events and unhealed emotional wounds, you will help your nervous system come into balance.
By regulating your nervous system, you will:
Feel more confident and balanced.
Have more clarity about who you are and what you want.
Have a greater tolerance for stress, pressure and challenges.
Have more energy that motivates you to move forward.
Feel happier and more fulfilled in life.
Better relationship with yourself and others.
Have a body that physically functions better.
Have better sleep which allows body and mind to repair.